What Would Batman Do?

Batman’s dead.

Grant Morrison’s hotly debated Batman R.I.P. storyline has concluded, as the title suggests, with Batman resting in peace (if you count plunging into an exploding helicopter as peaceful).

But before you insert your suicidal emoticons, keep in mind that “death” in the DC universe doesn’t exactly mean someone’s dead.  Superman’s heart stopped beating when he fought a mute wrestler, Green Lantern sacrificed himself to power up the sun somehow, the Flash crinkled up into nothingness when he went over 88 miles per hour in his DeLorean, and they’re all on the Justice League roster today.  Bottom line, we’re all expecting Our Main Man to return in a drawn out, profitable manner .

Here’s how it will go down: Nightwing, Robin, Huntress, and even Commissioner Gordon will all don the symbolic cape and cowl to become the next Batman (and they are all deserving of it).  We’ll quickly forget this is the same formula DC used with Superman.  But if they really want us to entertain the idea that He’s really gone, they’ll keep Him dead for a lot longer.  Say, five years or so.  Any plot holes can instantly be blamed on Clayface clones and a Lazarus Pit.

Don’t get me wrong — I’m probably buying the trade paperback version of Batman R.I.P. when it’s available, and I’ll undoubtedly cry like a French baby, but I’m putting fifty bucks on the fact that Bruce Wayne will be celebrating Easter in November.

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